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St. Augustine
Feast on Thursday 28th August
(The Confessions of St. Augustine, the saint's own account of his life, is one of the world's great books. After 1500 years it remains as fresh as ever; it still speaks to the human heart with fervent conviction. In the extract below we hear how Augustine was finally led to turn away from a life of selfishness and sin to embrace the Christian vision. Given the influence of St. Augustine's thought on a thousand years of European Christianity, this conversion can be regarded as one of the pivotal moments of world history.)
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Augustine |
But when a deep consideration had from the secret bottom of my soul
drawn together and heaped up all my misery in the sight of my heart;
there arose a mighty storm, bringing a mighty shower of tears. I
cast myself down I know not how, under a certain fig-tree, giving
full vent to my tears; and the floods of mine eyes gushed out an acceptable
sacrifice to Thee. And, not indeed in these words, yet to this purpose,
spake I much unto Thee:
And Thou, O Lord, how long? how long, Lord,
wilt Thou be angry for ever? Remember not our former iniquities, for
I felt that I was held by them. I sent up these sorrowful words: How
long, how long, "to-morrow, and tomorrow?" Why not now? why not is
there this hour an end to my uncleanness?
So was I speaking and weeping in the most bitter contrition of my
heart, when, lo! I heard from a neighbouring house a voice, as of
boy or girl, I know not, chanting, and oft repeating, "Take up and
read; Take up and read." Instantly, my countenance altered, I began
to think most intently whether children were wont in any kind of play
to sing such words: nor could I remember ever to have heard the like.
So checking the torrent of my tears, I arose; interpreting it to be
no other than a command from God to open the book, and read the first
chapter I should find. ... Eagerly then I returned to the place where
Alypius was sitting; for there had I laid the volume of the Apostle
when I arose thence. I seized, opened, and in silence read that section
on which my eyes first fell:
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Not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness,
not in strife and envying; but put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and
make not provision for the flesh, in concupiscence. (Paul's Letter to the Romans 13:14f.) |
No further would I read; nor needed I: for instantly at the end of
this sentence, by a light as it were of serenity infused into my heart,
all the darkness of doubt vanished away.
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