SYSTEM PROBLEM REPORT
This is a form to make the reporting of problems consistent, allow records of problems to be kept, and a method of discouraging users from reporting faults we can't deal with in the first place.
1. Your Name: _____________________ Do you work here? Yes ___ No ___ Department: ____________________
2. Your Login Name: _______________
3. The date? __/__/__
4. The date the problem first occurred if different? __/__/__
5. Problem severity: Minor ___ Minor ___ Minor ___ Minor ___
6. Which machine? ___________________
7. What appears to be at fault? Floppy ___ Mouse ___ Communications ___ Disk ___ Base Unit ___ Network ___ Keyboard ___ Screen ___ Nothing ___ Everything ___ Don't Know ___
7.1 Is it plugged in? Yes ___ No ___ 7.2 Is it switched on? Yes ___ No ___ 7.3 Has it been stolen? Yes ___ No ___ 7.4 Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes ___ No ___ 7.4.1 Have you thumped it? Yes ___ No ___ 7.4.2 Have you made it worse? Yes ___ No ___ 7.5 Have you read the manual? Yes ___ No ___ 7.5.1 Are you sure you've read the manual? Yes ___ No ___ 7.5.2 Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? Yes ___ No ___ 7.5.3 Did you understand it? Yes ___ No ___ 7.5.4 If 'Yes", then why can't you fix it yourself? ___________________ ___________________________________________________________________
7.6 Is the equipment unexpectedly noisy? Yes ___ No ___ 7.6.1 If 'Yes", what sort of noise? Grinding ___ Rattling ___ Squeaking ___ Musical ___ Whirring ___ High Pitched Whine ___ Clicking ___ Sound of disk head drilling hole in disk ___ Strange, out of tune whistling or humming ___
7.7 Is there a smell of burning? Yes ___ No ___ 7.7.1 If "Yes", is the equipment on fire? Yes ___ No ___ 7.7.2 If "Yes", is the building on fire? Yes ___ No ___
7.8 Is the fault repeatable? Yes ___ No ___
7.9.1 Have you been using the equipment for the purpose it was intended? Yes ___ No ___ 7.9.2 What were you doing (with the equipment) at the time the fault occurred? ___________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________
7.9.1 If 'Nothing', explain why you were logged in. ___________________________________________________________________
7.10 Do you have any independent witnesses of the problem? Yes ___ No ___
7.11 Describe the problem ______________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________
7.12 Now, describe the problem accurately ______________________________ ___________________________________________________________________ 7.13 Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem ___________________ ___________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________
7.14 Can't you do something else, rather than bothering us? Yes ___ No ___
When something goes wrong with your family's PC at home, simply bring it in to work and dump it on a sysadmin's chair with no name, no phone number and no description of the problem. They really love a good puzzle.
When you have a sysadmin on the phone talking you through changing various settings, start reading the newspaper. They don't actually intend you to do anything; they just love to hear the sound of their own voices.
When the printer won't print, please re-send the job at least 20 times. Print jobs frequently get sucked into black holes.
Don't learn the proper name for anything technical. Technical Support Units know exactly what you mean by "My thingy's outta whatsit".
If you've just started taking night classes in computer science, please feel free to go around and update the network drivers for all your co-workers. They're grateful for any overtime.
Don't ever thank us. They're getting paid for this.
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