STAR TREK QUOTES - DEEP SPACE 9

There are some excellent, harrowing political episodes in the show's first season, and some indication that its writers were interested in, though not entirely certain how, to tell continuous, messy stories. But the bulk of the season is given over to the standard Star Trek template of coming across a weird thing (or, in Deep Space Nine's case, having a weird thing emerge through the wormhole) and spending 44 minutes getting into, and then out of, trouble because of it...  In fact, there are several Deep Space Nine's--the Next Generation clone, the frontier story, the character drama, the political space opera, the war story, and I've left out the fantasy, which is what the Bajor episodes become as they grow more concerned with the Prophets' struggle against the Pagh-Wraiths. Over the course of seven seasons, the show slowly transforms from one to another, occasionally backsliding and leaping ahead, and sometimes combining more than one in the same season or episode. With the exception of the first of these 'sub-shows', none are inherently good or bad, and each, when done well, draws on a different set of the show's strengths. As a result, it is just as accurate to say that the first season is better than the seventh as it is to make the opposite argument--it all depends on which show you were interested in. Regardless of the kind of story it's telling, Deep Space Nine achieved excellence when it committed whole-heartedly to the complexity of its universe.
        - Abigail Nussbaum, revisiting DS9 on her "Asking the Wrong Questions" blog

Like the show's reliance on old-fashioned storytelling conventions, such episodes comprised of entirely distinct A and B plots (which is annoying) or the almost complete absence of flashbacks and prequels (which is enormously refreshing), there is something almost quaint about the niceness that underlies even Deep Space Nine's grimmest episodes... It had a thirteen year old boy's sense of humor and an eight year old girl's notion of romance. But though it was never spectacular in a single respect it was quite often good, or even very good, in several, and the overall effect of that steady, low-key competence was a wholly satisfying story. First and foremost, Deep Space Nine's accomplishment is the creation of a completely believable, richly textured world...  Life on the station is sometimes painfully ordinary, but therein lies the show's strength...
        - Abigail Nussbaum, revisiting DS9 on her "Asking the Wrong Questions" blog

Following the adventures of a group of Starfleet officers on a 24th century frontier outpost.
        - RTE Guide capsule for the series

CONTENTS
~ Season #1
~ Season #2
~ Season #3
~ Novels

SEASON #1

"It's been a long time."
"Yes sir. We met in battle. I was on the Saratoga at Wolf 359."
"I assume you've been briefed on the events leading to the Cardassian withdrawal."
"I understand they've spent the last half century robbing the planet of every valuable resource, before abandoning it."
"They've left the Bajorans without any way to be self-sustaining... the relief efforts we've been coordinating are barely adequate. I've come to know the Bajorans. I'm one of the strongest proponents for their entry into the Federation."
"Is it going to happen?"
"Not easily. The ruling parties are at each others throats. Factions that were united against the Cardassians have resumed old conflicts."
"Sounds like they're not ready."
"Your job is to do everything short of violating the Prime Directive to make sure they are."
"Starfleet has made me aware of your objections to this assignment, Commander. I would think that after three years at the Utopia Planitia yards, you'd be ready for a change."
"I have a son that I'm raising alone, Captain. This is not the ideal environment."
"Unfortunately, as Starfleet officers, we do not always have the luxury of serving in an ideal environment."
        - Commander Sisko and Captain Picard, "Emissary"

"I love the Bajorans... such a deeply spiritual culture. But they make a dreadful ale. Don't ever trust an ale from a god-fearing people."
        - Quark, yet to discover the brews of Ireland, "Emissary"

"This'll be perfect., real... frontier medicine."
"Frontier medicine?"
"Major, I had my choice of any job in the fleet. I didn't want some cushy job or a research grant. I wanted this. The farthest reaches of the galaxy. One of the most remote outposts available. This is where the adventure is. This is where heroes are made. Right here. In the wilderness."
"This wilderness is my home."
        - Bashir, about to offend Major Kira, "Emissary"

"Red alert. Shields up."
"What shields?"
        - Kira and O'Brien, "Emissary"

"Fire six photon torpedoes across Jasad's bow..."
"We only have six photons, Major."
"We're not going to win this battle with torpedoes, Chief."
        - Kira and O'Brien, trying to bluff the Cardassians, "Emissary"

"Look for solutions from within, Commander."
        - Kai Opaka, to Sisko, "Emissary"

"Commander, laws change, depending on who's making them. But justice, is justice"
        - Odo, "A Man Alone"

"Without the Federation, the Cardassians would be back in a minute to take control of the wormhole. And the wormhole is the future of Bajor, Tahna.  It's bringing ships and commerce... it makes us a power in the quadrant."
"I don't want to be a power in the quadrant.  I want Bajor for Bajorans. I want our homeland back... Bajoran independence."
        - Kira and Tahna Los, with two visions for Bajor's future, "Past Prologue"

"Join me, Doctor; enhance my evening."
        - Garak, striking up a friendship with Bashir, "Past Prologue"

"Doctor, am I making myself clear? I want you to buy a new suit tonight at twenty-fifty-five. Exactly."
        - Garak, with a request for Bashir, "Past Prologue"

"I don't understand why he wants me involved?"
"Sometimes, communications can't be conducted through official channels. Maybe this is their way of telling us that we have a common enemy."
"What do you want me to do?"
"I think, Doctor, that you could definitely use a new suit."
        - Bashir asks Sisko's advice about Garak, "Past Prologue"

"Maybe there are still wars to be fought and I'm just making a fool of myself doing what I'm doing here."
"Sounds like you're trying to talk yourself into something. Or out of something."
"Either way, I have to betray someone."
"The important thing is not to betray yourself."
"How could I possibly turn against my own people?"
"Are they? Your own people?"
"They're no different than I used to be."
"Used to be."
        - Kira and Odo, "Past Prologue"

"We will complete our business with Tahna Los in four hours."
"And what business might that be?"
"That is not your concern."
"If it requires that those I represent must take extra precautions, it becomes my concern."
        - Garak, making a deal with Lursa and B'Etor, "Past Prologue"

"The old ways don't work anymore. Everything is different now. I had to do this... for Bajor. I hope you'll understand some day."
"Traitor."
        - Kira and Tahna Los, choosing paths, "Past Prologue"

"I have no use for fantasy adventure, I am Tosk, I live the greatest adventure one could ever desire."

- Tosk, DS9 "Captive Pusuit" "I am sorry - I have no vices for you to exploit." - Tosk to Quark, "Captive Pursuit" "You sleep a full third of your rotation. You rest and relax while you are awake. The Alpha quadrant has too much... 'down' time."

        - Tosk to O'Brien in Quark's, "Captive Pursuit"

"I am Tosk, the hunted. I live to outwit the hunters for another day to survive until I die with honor."

        - Tosk, "Captive Pursuit"

"One day as a Tosk is enough for me."

        - O'Brien bids farewell to Tosk, "Captive Pursuit"

"Still chasing your own tail? Picard and his lackeys would have solved all this techno-babble hours ago. No wonder you're not commanding a starship."

        - Q taunts Sisko, "Q-less"

"You Klaestrons are allies of the Cardassians. Your knowledge of this station confirms that. They must have given you the layout, which not only compromises Bajoran security, but also... annoys us."

        - Kira, representing Bajoran interests, "Dax"

"Dad, I'm fourteen."
"I'm glad we agree on something."

- Jake & Benjamin Sisko, "Move Along Home" "And remember -- when in doubt, be ruthless!" - The advice of the Grand Nagus, "The Nagus" "They're putting out a mutual induction field that would block 99% of all transmissions to and from the surface."
"Is there any way for us to get a comm line through the field?"
"I've got one percent to work with, don't I?"

        - O'Brien & Dax, "Battlelines"

"Why do we tell her stories about evil dwarfs who want to steal children?"
        - Miles questions the wisdom of telling fairytales to Molly, "If Wishes Were Horses"

"You're constantly in my thoughts. I can't concentrate..."
"You seemed to be concentrating just fine on that junior lieutenant at the reception for Captain Stadius."
"She was a poor substitute for you."
"...Julian, you're a wonderful friend. I enjoy the time we spend together."
        - Julian gets the 'just friends' speech from Dax

"How is our young doctor?"
"Young."
        - Sisko and Dax, about Bashir

"I must be hallucinating..."
"Why are you fighting this?"
"Why am I fighting this... I have no good answer to that question..."
        - Julian and his fantasy Jadzia

"In a way, I feel as if we've invaded your privacy. We all have fantasies and dreams that we keep to ourselves. Thoughts that should remain private."
"I'm glad you understand."
"Of course I do. I was a young man. Once. ...She really is submissive, isn't she? Is that how you'd like me to be, Julian? So submissive?"
"I am not submissive. Am I?"
        - Jadzia & Julian's fantasy Jadzia

More than half the people aboard DS9 have reported manifestations of their imagined thoughts.
        - Sisko's station log

"We're going to yellow alert..."
"Yellow alert against our own imaginations?"
        - Sisko and Kira

"Let me guess. Another clever Federation experiment has gone awry and you accidently turned the whole
station into one vast holosuite."
        - Quark to Odo

"Perimeter sensors are picking up a subspace oscillation. What the hell does that mean?"
        - Kira faces technobabble from the computer, "If Wishes Were Horses"

"How do you feel?"
"Fine."
"Good. Because I've got no way to know. Your body chemistry defies analysis."
        - Bashir and Odo, as he recovers in the infirmary, "Dramatis Personae"

"Here we are. A Modela aperitif. It's bright and sweet. Much like yourself, Lieutenant. I'll put it on your tab."
"The bad flattery is on the house."
        - Quark and Kira, competing for Dax's attention

"I've been friends with Benjamin Sisko for many years... In many ways, he's like a son to me. Or at least a nephew... Some kind of close relative anyway."
        - Dax

"The Klingon, Doctor, what did you find?"
"He's still dead, if that's what you mean."
        - Odo, questioning Bashir about the autopsy

"Doesn't Kira's behavior seem a little out of the ordinary? And the others... since when is Bashir so concerned with station politics."
"Don't look at me that way — I'm perfectly normal."
        - Odo and Ouark

"Management by mutiny. That's standard operating procedure on a Klingon vessel."
"But awfully unusual for a Federation-run space station..."
        - O'Brien and Odo

"Our exploration of the fifth planet has turned out to be a waste of time. This world is not worthy of a Klingon colony. All we found was a collection of energy spheres which possessed some type of telepathic archive. The spheres described an ancient power struggle that destroyed a race called the Saltah'na."
        - The Klingon first officer's log, "Dramatis Personae"

"You can never undo what I've accomplished -- the dead will still be dead!!"

- Gul Darheel, ‘Duet’ "Procedure is not recommended."
"Listen, I've had enough of your opinions, computer, just do it!"
        - O'Brien, in a running battle with the Cardassian computer system, "The Forsaken"

"Relax, Chief. It's just a computer."
"She's no computer, sir. She's my arch enemy."
        - Sisko and O'Brien

"Think of it as an opportunity, Doctor. You never know when a friendly ambassador will be in the right place at the right time to help your career."
"Another hour with them could destroy my career."
"It's a simple job. Just keep them happy and away from me."
"Simple? Nothing makes them happy. They are dedicated to being unhappy and to spreading that unhappiness wherever they go... they are the Ambassadors of Unhappy."
"We've all had assignments like this, Doctor... As a matter of fact, Curzon Dax used to take perverse pleasure in assigning me to take care of VIP guests..."
"So, now, you take the same perverse pleasure in doing it to me."
        - Sisko and Bashir

"I'm sorry but as the sign says... the establishment is not responsible for the loss of any personal items."
"Sign? What sign?"
"The one above the door."
"You'd have to stand on a chair to read that!"
        - Quark, Lwaxana and Bashir, after she is robbed in Quark's

"Commander, she seems interested in me."
"What's wrong with that?"
"She's extremely aggressive."
"I see. So, she's after you... Have you thought of letting her catch you?"
        - Odo and Sisko, about Lwaxana Troi

"I don't have time for romantic interludes... frankly, in my humble opinion, most of you humanoids spend far too much time on your respective mating rituals."
"It does help the procreation of one's species."
"Procreation does not require changing how you smell, or writing bad poetry, or sacrificing various plants to serve as tokens of affection."
        - Odo, on romance, "The Forsaken"

"Constable, you can handle thieves and killers but not one Betazoid woman?"
"I understand thieves and killers. I don't understand... her."
        - Sisko and Odo, "The Forsaken"

"It's easy to look back seven centuries and judge what was right and wrong."

        - Sisko, "In the Hands of the Prophets"

"Odo, I am not a killer."
"No. But most of your friends are."
"True. And I would gladly sell one of them to you if I could."

        - Quark & Odo, "In the Hands of the Prophets"

"I once asked Kai Opaka why a disbeliever was destined to seek the prophets. She told me one should never look into the eyes of one's own gods."

        - Vedek Winn to Sisko, "In the Hands of the Prophets"

"Today, I am only a Vedek. If the prophets will it, someday, I may be Kai. And I can be a better friend to you then."
"In other words, being my friend now might hurt your chances."
"The prophets teach us patience."
"It appears they also teach you politics."

        - Vedek Bareil & Sisko, "In the Hands of the Prophets"

SEASON #2

"Every once in a while, declare peace -- it confuses the hell out of your enemies."

        - Quark quotes a Rule of Acquisition, "The Homecoming"

"What you did, Major, was declare war on Cardassia. Thankfully they declined the invitation."

        - Minister Jaro to Kira, "The Homecoming"

"It might be interesting to explore useless for a while..."

- Kira, after being relieved of duties, ’The Circle’ "We've got to leave! Well, I do, anyway; you can just turn into a couch." - Quark, on the impending takeover of the station, ’The Circle’ "We've got to do something. *I've* got to do something."

        - Li Nalas, "The Circle"

"There is one problem. The guys flying those ships... used to be the guys flying these ships."

        - Kira dogfights, "The Siege"

"I've done everything I can to help. I would die for my people but--"
"Sure you would. Dying gets you off the hook. Question is, are you willing to live for your people? Live the role they want you to play. That's what they need from you right now."

        - Li Nalas & Sisko, "The Siege"

"Humanoid death rituals are an interest of mine."
"Death rituals?"
"Everybody needs a hobby... Some species burn their dead, others pack them in blocks of ice, some even surround themselves with the company of family corpses. But the Ferengi ritual of chopping up their loved ones and selling them... I find that irresistible. What a fitting and dignified way to honor the memory of great Ferengi entrepreneurs. I'm thinking of starting a collection, putting up a display case in my office. There'll be a special space reserved for you in there, Quark."
        - Odo and Quark, as Quark tries to sell pieces of the not-quite-dead Plegg, "The Alternate"

"As a scientist yourself, Lieutenant, you can appreciate the difficulty of our dilemma, and the elegance of the solution. When Odo was first found, no one knew who, or indeed, what we were dealing with. A shapeless, viscous mass of fluid, a veritable organic broth. That was our Odo in the beginning."
"When did you realize you were dealing with a sentient lifeform?"
"He didn't. I had to teach him that myself... It was a dilemma for me. I'd never seen anything like these creatures either."
"'Seen' isn't really an appropriate description. He had no eyes per se... He had never *perceived anything like us before."
        - Dr Mora, Dax and Odo

"I'd been coming into the lab every morning, and every morning Odo was still in his liquid form, resting in a Krokan petri beaker. Well... one morning, Odo wasn't there. The beaker was empty, and beside it: an identical beaker that had not been there before. A perfect replica in every way. It was amazing. It hasn't been the same since you left, Odo. Working with you was the most rewarding part of my career."
        - Dr Mora

"I think, Odo, that you have been in the rather ironic position of trying to track down... yourself."
        - Dr Mora, to a disconcerted Odo

"When was the last time you listened to a Klingon opera?"
"When I was your age..."
"Dad, just because you had to suffer through all that doesn't mean I have to."
"Yes. It does."
        - Jake, as his dad encourages him to study for his music test

"Doctor Bashir give you permission to be up and about?"
"Doctor Bashir wouldn't listen to me and hid my clothes so I wouldn't leave. I had to sneak out to my quarters in a hospital gown that wouldn't close in the back..."
        - Sisko to a shaky Dax

"Feel like a Raktajino before we call it a night?"
"My replicator or yours..."
"I was thinking of the Promenade."
"I knew that. Thanks anyway."
        - Dax and Bashir

"She enjoys it... it gives her some perverse kind of pleasure."
        - Bashir, after Dax raises and dashes his romantic hopes again

"I believe in coincidences. Coincidences happen every day. But I don't trust coincidences."
        - Garak, "Cardassians"

"Excuse me. But if I understand the Cardassian political system, the civilian leaders have no direct authority over military officers..."
"Who's been tutoring you in Cardassian social studies, Doctor?"
"Your old friend, Garak."
"Well, remind my old friend that the withdrawal from Bajor was a decision made by the civilian leaders... one that I clearly opposed."
        - Bashir & Gul Dukat, "Cardassians"

"So, you _deduced_ that Garak _thinks_ Dukat is lying about something you're not sure of, and you proceeded to interrupt _my_ conversation to confront him about whatever that might be."
"I'm sorry, Commander."
"Don't apologize -- it's been the high point of my day. DON'T do it again."
        - Sisko & Bashir, "Cardassians"

"Excuse me sir, have you come to take us back to Cardassia?"
"I'm afraid not, child."
        - A Cardassian orphan on Bajor and Garak, "Cardassians"

"You're not as stupid as you look."
"I am too!"
        - Rom pleads ignorance to Odo, ’Necessary Evil’

Commence station security log, Stardate 47282.5. At the request of Commander Sisko, I will hereafter be recording a daily log of law enforcement affairs. The reason for this exercise is beyond my comprehension, except perhaps that humans have a compulsion to keep records and lists and files, so many in fact that they have to invent new ways to store them microscopically; otherwise, their records would overrun all known civilizations. My own very adequate memory not being good enough for Starfleet, I am pleased to put my voice to this official record of this day: Everything's under control. End log.
        - Odo, "Necessary Evil"

And of course, it doesn't hurt to be a raging egomaniac.
        - Prof Seytik, "Second Sight"

"I thought the theoretical maximum for those engines was warp 9.5."
"It was."
        - O’Brien pushing a ship too far, "Second Sight"

"You know, I was really looking forward to that celebration on T'Lani Prime... I don't know if you've noticed, but the T'Lani women are quite attractive."
"I'm not blind, Julian."
"Of course not. But you are married."
"Just because you're married doesn't mean you stop looking at women."
"As long as you don't let your wife see you look. For me, tonight's celebration would have been an adventure. The most you could have hoped for was a good meal."
"Women. That's all you ever think about."
"No, it isn't... Though I do think about them a lot."
"Just wait until you fall in love with one."
"I did once."
"Didn't work out?"
"Close. Not quite. I don't know. Somehow marriage doesn't seem fair..."
"Fair?"
"Fair to them.  I mean look at us. Our lives are constantly in danger. There's enough to worry about without worrying about the wife and kids back home worrying about us. Sorry, Chief.  That's the way I feel. It's the way a lot of career officers feel."
"Well, all of you 'career officers' have no idea what you're missing."
        - Bashir and O'Brien, "Armageddon Game"

"Miles, he saved your life, you know."
"And he's never going to let me forget it."
        - Keiko and Miles O'Brien, about Julian, "Armageddon Game"

"Phasers on stun, Mr. O'Brien. I want those voles taken ALIVE!"
        - Sisko deals with a rodent invasion, "Playing God"

"By the way, their mating season begins in six weeks..."
        - O'Brien consults an unhelpful Cardassian about the voles, "Playing God"

It worked in Hamlin.
        - Julian offers O'Brien a tip on clearing out the voles, "Playing God"

"You haven't touched your racht... You've been moving it around your plate to make it look like you've touched it."
"I didn't have to move it... it moved itself."
        - Dax and Arjin, in the Klingon restaurant, "Playing God"

"Serious? No. I just threw my whole life out a porthole. Nothing serious."
        - Arjin has a bad day, "Playing God"

"It always takes me longer to get ready as a female."
        - Jadzia, apologising for her lateness, "Playing God"

"I love her, Dad. She's everything I ever wanted in a woman."
"I'm sure she's a wonderful girl..."
"She's not a girl... she's a woman... she doesn't like to be called a girl... everybody calls her that and she hates it... she wants to be something better than that..."
"Than what...?"
"Than a Dabo girl."
"You're in love with a Dabo girl?!"
        - Jake and Benjamin Sisko, "Playing God"

"Jadzia Dax is not Curzon Dax... but I am Dax... and I'm slowly coming to terms with what that means. Sometimes it means gambling or wrestling. Sometimes it means waking up an initiate before he slides into the middle of the pack and gets overlooked."
        - Dax, with some advice for Arjin, "Playing God"

"So, how well does this woman know you? Just enough to dislike you, or well enough to *really* hate you?"
        - Odo to Quark, "Profit & Loss"

"One second. [Bangs tables, chairs, everything in sight] ...The station's security chief's a shape-shifter.  You can never be too careful."
        - Quark, about to make a proposal, "Profit & Loss"

"If anyone tries to hurt her, they're going to have to deal with me."
"What're you going to do? Short-change them at the dabo table?"
        - Quark and Garak, about Natima, "Profit & Loss"

"She wants to know if it hurts. Of course it hurts, it's supposed to hurt, it's a PHASER..."
        - Quark, after being hit, "Profit & Loss"

"They made you a Gul? I didn't realize the situation on Cardassia had gotten so desperate."
"I find your bitterness extremely... gratifying. I'm glad to see that you're adjusting so poorly to exile."
        - Garak and Gul Toran, "Profit & Loss"

"If you're not a spy ... maybe you're an outcast."
"Or maybe I'm an outcast spy."
"How can you be both?"
"I never said I was either."
        - Bashir and Garak, "Profit and Loss"

"The trouble is EARTH. On Earth, there is no poverty, no crime, no war. You look out the window of Starfleet Headquarters and you see Paradise -- well, it's easy to be a *saint* in Paradise."

- Sisko, "The Maquis, Part II" "How do you propose to stop them?"
"What's that human expression? Shoot to kill.'"
"We'll stop them with words if possible... with force if necessary."

        - Dax, Dukat & Sisko deal with the Maquis, "The Maquis, Part II"

"I'm having dinner with Captain Bouday."
"The Galumite? You're going out on a date with him?"
"Is something wrong with that?"
"No. Not at all."
"He happens to be brilliant. His brain is twice the size of yours and mine."
"I know, I've seen it."
"It's not his fault that Galumites have transparent skulls."

- Dax & Kira, "The Maquis I" "The demilitarized zone."
"Not so demilitarized, I'm afraid." - Sisko & Admiral Necheyev, ‘Maquis’ A good interrogator doesn't allow his subject to die; you lose the advantage. - Gul Dukat, "The Maquis I" "I am _way_ beyond frustrated." - Kira, "Sanctuary" "That's a rather personal question."
"Sorry, but after seven lifetimes, the impersonal questions aren't much fun any more." - Odo and Dax, "Shadowplay" Garak has been lecturing me on surveillance techniques. - Julian, in way over his head, "Shadowplay" [The Wire]
"Doctor, did anyone ever tell you that you are an infuriating pest?"
"Chief O'Brien, all the time, and I don't pay any attention to him, either."
        - Garak and Bashir

"I wasn't yelling; I was just expressing my opinion, LOUDLY."
        - Sisko

"Quark's sent several coded messages to Cardassia Prime in the past few days. I routinely monitor all of Quark's subspace communications."
"Is that... legal?"
"It's in the best interests of station security."
        - Odo and Bashir

"I hope you don't have one of those little bugs hidden in my quarters."
"Should I?"
        - Bashir and Odo

"Quark, you idiot!"
"Is something wrong?"
"Is something wrong? I'm ruined. My career is over. You and your requisition code. It's for classified bio-technology. Even the cursed number is classified. Where did you get it? No. Don't tell me. I don't want to know."
        - Glinn Boheeka and Quark

"If you tell me what it was meant for, maybe I can figure out a way to remove it."
"It's hopeless, Doctor. Believe me, it can't be removed. If it could
be easily removed, it would be useless. You see on Cardassia, I was entrusted with certain... information. Information that needed to be kept safe, regardless of the situation. My implant was given to me by Enabran Tain, the head of the Obsidian Order. If I was ever tortured, it was designed to stimulate the pleasure centers of my brain... to trigger the production of vast amounts of natural endorphins. I hope you appreciate the irony, Doctor. The sole purpose of the implant was to make me immune to pain."
"What caused it to malfunction?"
"It was never meant for continuous use."
        - Bashir and Garak, about the wire

"Living on this station is torture for me, Doctor. The temperature is always too cold, the lights are always too bright. Every Bajoran on the station looks at me with loathing and contempt. One day I decided I couldn't live with it anymore. So I... took the pain away."
"You activated the implant."
        - Garak and Bashir

"I was left to live out my days with nothing to look forward to but having lunch with you."
"I'm sorry you feel that way. I thought you enjoyed my company."
"I did. That's the worst part. To think that I actually enjoyed eating mediocre food while staring at your smug, sanctimonious face. I hate this place and I hate you."
        - Garak and Bashir

"Elim and I were both powerful men in the Obsidian Order... They called us the 'Sons of Tain'. Even the Guls feared us."
        - (Elim) Garak, with another obfuscation for Bashir

"Well, Doctor, you've come all this way to see me... aren't you going to say something?"
"How'd you know my name?"
"Information is my business... I hope you weren't greeted too rudely upon entering Cardassian space."
"Not nearly as rudely as I expected."
"Good. I alerted them that you were coming. The military hates surprises. Still, what you did was very brave. I'm impressed. Can I get you something to drink? Tarkalean tea perhaps?"
"I always drink... Tarkalean tea."
"A good host knows the needs of his guests."
        - Enabran Tain and Bashir

"That Cardassian Quark spoke to... Boheeka. I guess he did have reason to fear the Obsidian Order."
"Everyone has reason to fear the Order."
        - Bashir and Tain

"Don't thank me, Doctor. I'm not doing Garak any favors. He doesn't deserve a quick death. On the contrary, I want him to live a long, miserable life. I want him to grow old on that station, surrounded by people who hate him, knowing he can never come home again."
        - Tain

"I see Garak hasn't changed a bit. Never tells the truth when a lie will do. The man has a rare gift for obfuscation. Doctor... Elim is Garak's first name."
        - Tain, after Bashir enquires about Garak's friend 'Elim'

"'How's the spice pudding?' Is that all you have to say for yourself?"
        - Bashir to Garak

"I for one, Doctor, am perfectly satisfied with the way things turned out. And I see no need to dwell on what was doubtlessly a difficult time for both of us. By the way, I just had the most interesting conversation with Constable Odo. It seems he was under the impression that I was a member of the Obsidian Order..."
        - Garak

SEASON #3

"The only explanation I can find it that our leaders have simply gone *insane*."

- Garak, The Search #2 "Can I ask what you're doing?"
"Yes." - ‘Equilibrium’ "I should have gone into insurance: better hours, more money, less scruples." - Quark, "The House of Quark" "All right... let's try a less subtle approach." *fires phaser*
        - Kira, "Civil Defense"

"Computer, access code Garak one-three-five-nine... Ironic isn't it? That the only place in the galaxy that still recognizes my access code is a Bajoran space station."
        - Garak

"Doctor, what exactly is it about this situation that's making you smile?"
"You, Garak. I wonder how many other tailors can rewrite Cardassian security protocols?"
"I wouldn't even venture a guess. But that reminds me, those pants you wanted altered are ready to be picked up."
        - Garak and Bashir, as the station goes into lockdown

"My phaser's on the Ops table. Can anyone get to it?"
"The answer, Major, is no." [after phasers blanket his area]
        - Kira and Bashir

"Let me guess... someone tried to duplicate my access code. A short time ago, I had the strangest experience... there I was, patrolling the demilitarized zone, when I received a distress signal -- from me. Or at least a recording of me. It seems that the Bajoran workers were rioting on Terok Nor. I must admit, it did pique my curiosity... Ah, Garak, groveling in a corner. That alone makes the trip worthwhile."
        - Gul Dukat

"It would seem that the computer is only targeting non-Cardassians after all."
"If you'd been on the station when I designed this program I would have made an exception in your case."
"You've always been shortsighted, it's held you back over the years. As I recall, your father had the same flaw."
        - Garak and Gul Dukat

"Dukat... if you're seeing this recording, it means you tried to abandon your post while the station's  self-destruct sequence was engaged. That will not be permitted. You have lost control of Terok Nor, disgracing yourself and Cardassia. Your attempt to escape is no doubt a final act of cowardice... The destruct sequence can no longer be halted. All you can do now is contemplate the depth of your disgrace. And try to die like a Cardassian."
        - Legate Kell's automated message for Dukat

"It's not to keep people out, it's to keep me in. I suppose during the occupation the Cardassians considered their security chief a security risk."
"And I know why. It's because they knew you were an honorable man... and now your integrity is going to get us both killed. I hope you're happy."
        - Odo and Quark, trapped by security office forcefield

"A lifetime of plotting and scheming, wheeling and dealing -- and what has it got me? One measly little bar. My uncle Frin owns thirty, and my cousin Gaila..."
"I know, he owns a moon... Come on, Quark, you've done all right for yourself... I've met a lot of Ferengi in my time, and the truth is, although some of them may have been more wealthy, I've never met one more devious."
        - Quark and Odo, fearing the worst, "Civil Defense"

"You humans, you never learn. You let your women go out in public, hold jobs, wear clothing... and you wonder why your marriages fall apart."
        - Quark, "Fascination"

"How many games of racquetball have we played in the last two months?"
"I don't know ... 15, maybe 20?"
"Try 70; I've been keeping track of that, too. And you know what all those games have proved to me? That I'm a poor substitute for your WIFE."
"I coulda told you that 60 games ago."
        - Bashir & O’Brien, ‘Fascination’

"This ship was built to fight. I think it's time she got her chance."

- Tom Riker, "Defiant" "You know, the rate we go through Runabouts, it's a good thing that Earth has so many rivers."
        - Kira, "Family Business"

"I think you'll find that random and unprovoked executions will keep your work force alert and motivated."

- Intendent Kira, "Through the Looking Glass" "Sorry to hear you say that, but if you're asking for a refund, forget it. The contract specifically says that satisfaction is not guaranteed."
        - Quark to his customer, "Meridian"

"You better hurry. I got the dampening field on this ship for a substantial discount."
        - Nagus Zek, regarding turbulent wormhole passage, "Prophet Motive"

"Treason, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder."

- Garak, "Second Skin" "Why should I care what the Bajoran government thinks of me? "
"I don't know. But it seems to me if someone were in trouble with the Cardassian Central Command a Bajoran space station under Federation control might just be the safest place in the galaxy."
"Commander, this is extortion."
"Hmmm.....Yes, it is."
        - Garak & Sisko, "Second Skin"

"I'll go along on your fool's errant, but I want one thing to be perfectly clear. I have no intention of sacrificing my life to save yours. If it looks like we're in danger of being captured, if there's any sign of trouble at all, you're on your own."
" Mr. Garak, I believe that's the first completely honest thing you've ever said to me."
"How perceptive of you, commander."
        - Garak & Sisko, "Second Skin"

"After all, we've been in worse situations than this one and come out all right."
"Name three."
        - Kira & Odo, ‘Heart Of Stone’

"Tell me how you got your name."
"Well, as you know, when Doctor Mora first brought me to his laboratory, it was under Cardassian supervision. All specimens had to be clearly labeled in Cardassian, so that the
overseers would always know what the scientists were working on. Since no one could decide exactly what I was, Mora labelled me 'Unknown Sample', which the overseer translated into Cardassian as Odo'ital."
"So your name is 'Unknown Sample'?"
"No. Odo'ital literally means 'Nothing'. Even after it became clear that I was sentient, the Bajoran scientists kept calling me that. As a joke, they split it into two words, like a Bajoran name: 'Odo Ital'. Which eventually got shortened..."
"To Odo."
        - Kira and Odo, "Heart of Stone"

"I'm sorry, Major -- but where you see a Sword of Stars, I see a comet; where you see vipers, I see three scientists; and where you see the Emissary, I see a Starfleet officer."
        - Sisko, "Destiny"

"I HATE temporal mechanics!"
        - O’Brien, ‘Visionary’

"Who am I, to argue with me."
        - Dr Bashir to O'Brien, who gives him information from Bashir's future self, "Visionary"

"Is there anything I can do for you while your gone?"
"As a matter of fact there is. In my shop, next to the replicator, if you examine the bulkhead you will find a false panel. Behind that panel is an isolinear rod. If I'm not back within 76 hours I want you take that rod and eat it."
"Eat it! You must be joking."
"Yes Doctor, I am."
"Very funny."
"Well I thought so."
        - Bashir to Garak as he is leaving for Cardassian space in "Improbable Cause"

"Why is it no-one ever believes me even when I'm telling the truth ? "
"Have you ever heard the story about the boy who cried wolf ? "
"No "
"It's a children's story about a young shepard boy who gets lonely while attending his flock, so he cries out to the villagers that a wolf is attacking the sheep. The people come running, but of course there's no wolf. He claims that it's run away and the people praise him for his vigilance. "
"Clever lad! Charming story."
"I'm not finished. The next day the boy does it again and the next two and on the fourth day a wolf really comes. The boy cries out to the top of his lungs, but the villagers ignore him and the boy and his flock are gobbled up."
"That's a little graphic for children, wouldn't you say?"
"But the point is; if you lie all the time nobody's going to believe you, even when you're telling the truth."
"Are you sure that's the point, doctor? "
"Of course. What else could it be?"
"That you should never tell the same lie twice."
        - Garak & Bashir, "Improbable Cause"

"Always burn your bridges behind you; you never know who might be trying to follow."
        - Enabran Tain, "Improbable Cause"

"No wonder the Romulans can't conquer the galaxy; no one can stomach their cuisine!"

- Enabran Tain, ’The Die Is Cast’ "With all due respect, Major, you're beginning to sound like a Romulan." - Sisko to Kira,’Explorers’ "For a moment there, I thought you had been put in charge of the Cardassian Ministry for the Refutation of Bajoran Fairy Tales." - Sisko to Dukat, ’Explorers’ "People either love you or hate you. [...] I mean, I *hated* you, when we first met ... and now..."
"And now?"
"And ... now I don't." - O’Brien to Bashir, [both very drunk], "Explorers" "It has been my observation that one of the prices of giving people freedom of choice is that sometimes they make the wrong choice."
        - Odo, "Shakaar"

"You cut your hair."
"You let yours grow."
"I liked you better the old way."
"I was just thinking the same thing... about you."

        - Shakaar and Kira

"I have a fine sense of direction. I knew exactly where I was the whole night."
"I found your tracks the next day. You were walking in circles."
"I was throwing the Cardassians off my trail!"
        - Furel and Kira, recalling days past

"The civil police have issued a province-wide alert for you and Kira. They've requested that the surrounding towns send more men and equipment to help in the search for the 'fugitives'."
"There's a familiar word. I haven't been called that in a while... I kinda missed it."
        - Furel and Shakaar, on the run

"I guess now you know how the Cardassians must've felt."
        - Sisko, to Kai Winn, after her hunt for Shakaar draws a blank

"The next time I start getting nostalgic for the old days... shoot me."
        - Lupaza, as the realities of life on the run hit home

"Well. I take it from your... calm demeanor that I've walked into an ambush..."
"I didn't fight the Cardassians for twenty-five years so that I could start shooting other Bajorans."
"Neither did I. So, what do we do about it?"
        - Shakaar and Colonel Lenaris

# NOVELS

"I would kill a million for a reason, but I wouldn’t kill even one for no reason."
        - The High Gul, in Diane Carey's "Station Rage"

"No! Now, which word of that didn't you understand?"
"Most likely the declarative negative. Apparently the Ferengi don't have a word in their language for 'no'."
"That's not true. We have several, depending on how much negotiation it will take to change your mind."
        - Kira, Odo and Quark, in LA Graf's "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

The paramilitary cells who'd begun shaking their fists in the northern provinces these last few months were little more than old resistance fighters with a new bone to chew. "Oppression is oppression!" was their cry — they claimed little difference between the Cardassians' iron bootheels and the Federation's paternal "control by example" from their lofty space-station pedestal. As far as Kira was concerned, all you had to do was look at their respective medical facilities to appreciate how unrelated their motives toward Bajor were.
        - Narration, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

"I thought that was supposed to be the difference between democracy and dictatorship? You don't have to blow up things just to have your voice heard."
"The humans say old habits die hard."
        - Kira and Odo, discussing the situation on Bajor, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

Which meant that Humans and Bajorans had something in common, although perhaps not the best attributes of either.
        - Narration, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

"I believe Sterchak's principal states that any complex phenomenon which occurs only one indicates a high probability of sentient life."
        - Jadzia Dax, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

"If indeed there are sentient creatures living in the Bajoran wormhole and keeping it open with some unimaginable technology, would they not represent an evolutionary anomaly? They cannot have evolved from nonsentient precursors in such a hostile environment."
"Perhaps they didn't, Honored Professor. Perhaps they evolved in a more hospitable environment first, and only colonized the wormhole later."
        - Professor T'Kreng and Cadet Heather Petersen, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

"You can learn a lot about an enemy by seeing what they leave behind on the battlefield."
        - Benjamin Sisko, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

"I shall start from the beginning. This is Professor T'Kreng of the Vulcan Scienec Academy. I have been killed and eaten by an alien of unknown affinity, one of a swarm which engulfed my research vessel."
        - Professor T'Kreng, with a letter from beyond the veil, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

"An inability to control all aspects of a problem is no excuse for neglecting the aspects you can control."
        - Professor T'Kreng, in "Invasion: Time's Enemy"

The Ferengi glared ay his old nemesis Odo... the pair had known and hated each other with passion since long before the Federation even know of the existence of DS9. The marriage of hatred between Quark and Odo predated O'Brien's marriage of love with Keiko, which seemed to have been around forever; Sisko was probably still a lieutenant commander without his own ship yet when Quark and Odo met and discovered revulsion at first sight... with a connection of hatred going back so far into the mists of antiquity, how could Quark and Odo not be the closest of enemies?
        - Narration, from Daffyd ab Hugh's "Rebels: The Conquered"

"You see, Odo? If only the hu-mans would start to teach the Rules of Acquisition in Starfleet Academy, they could rule the... wait. Forget I said anything."
        - Quark, in "Rebels: The Conquered"

From O'Brien's passionate, rich, Irish cusring, Quark's temper tantrum, and Odo's look of disgust, Worf understood the answer even without anyone answering.
        - Narration, from "Rebels: The Conquered"

Across a stream that O'Brien dubbed the Anna Liffey, after a river that bisected old Dublin, fabled in song and legend...
        - Narration, from "Rebels: The Conquered"

There's no being in the cosmos faster than a Ferengi who thinks his life may be in danger.
        - Sisko, watching Quark make a quick exit in "Wrath of the Prophets"

"I'll say this for you, Ro. You may be obnoxious, but you're damned efficient."
"Thank you. Those are my two best qualities."
        - Kira and Ro, in "Wrath of the Prophets"

"My God, Kira, you look like you've been through a war."
"Only a small one."
        - Dax and Kira, in "Wrath of the Prophets"

#

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