Look For the Good
Look only for the good in all people and
things, and leave
all the rest to God. Then you will start having peace.
- John-Roger
(From: Loving Each Day for Peacemakers, Choosing Peace
Every Day)
THE TOP 10 WAYS TO LOVE THE
NEGATIVITY IN YOUR LIFE
(c) Christine Morris, Ph.D.,
Prosperity and abundance theories can backfire when our
absorption with being positive causes us to resist and
judge the very human experience of lack and limitation.
1. Remember the Chinese yin/yang symbol.
Inevitably, we all experience the extremes of abundance
and lack, freedom and limitation. Without the contrast,
these concepts would be meaningless. In the Chinese
symbol for yin and yang, there is always a speck of black
in the white, and there is always a speck of white in the
black.
2. Put out your welcome mat. In a calm,
meditative state, imagine that your negative thoughts and
emotions are strangers knocking at your door. Open the
door and let them into your awareness -- let yourself
feel the intensity of your rage, sadness, fear, etc. --
and then let that energy move through you. Ask your
emotions what message they have for you.
3. Love the messengers. Your emotions --
even the distasteful ones -- carry messages for you about
your authentic self and your true path in this life. No
need to kill the messengers -- love them! And ask them
why they are there. What do you want but are afraid you
can't have?
4. Fall apart if you need to. When we
are experiencing significant stress, "holding it
together" means we are trying to do things ourselves.
When we give ourselves permission to fall apart -- to
stop looking and acting like we have it all together --
we open ourselves to the possibility of receiving support.
5. Give in to your limitations.
According to Rumi, "the moment you accept what
troubles you've been given, the door opens." When we
resist or deny or avoid the inevitable limitations in our
lives, their power over us grows. We open ourselves to
greater possibilities when we welcome our limitations
with gratitude and compassion.
6. Look to the turtle. No, your desire
or dream isn't here... yet. Experiencing lack or
negativity in your life doesn't mean your dream is
pointless and futile. It just means you have to be
patient and keep moving in small steps toward your desire.
7. Fan the flame. When you experience
any type of negativity, you have the opportunity to
clarify, focus, and strengthen your desire. Strong desire
expressed through consistent action is what enables you
to attract your dreams.
8. Pretend you're playing "hot and
cold." Ever play "hot and cold" as a
child? When you get farther away from the hidden object,
someone says "you're getting colder." This is
how lack and negativity in our lives help us -- they give
us valuable feedback about how to move away from what we
don't want toward what we do want.
9. Cultivate inner peace. Inner peace
does not come from avoiding negative experiences and
emotions. Inner peace comes from having a spirit
expansive enough to receive tumultuous emotions without
losing our center. Who we really are is untouched by the
emotions we experience.
10. Find any excuse to laugh. Here's a
favorite cartoon from my husband's collection: "If
you're having trouble laughing at yourself, put on some
weight and let your children cut your hair!" Here's
to us beautiful ones!
Author Profile: Christine Morris, Ph.D., who can be
reached at
cmorris@howardcc.edu
FAILURE
(c) Linda R. Dominguez
Thomas Edison once said, "I have not failed.
I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
We've all done it - made a series of little mistakes or
big "honking" mistakes. But if you spend
any energy on "shoulda, woulda, coulda" (regret),
it's time to make some changes.
When we use phrases like, "I should have",
"I could have", "I would have if" we
are expressing a form of regret - often based on the
expectations of others.
Regret, in its most basic form, has two parts:
first, drawing a comparison between what happened and
what might have happened IF, and second, making a
judgment about that discrepancy. While our ability
to imagine choices, options and alternatives, albeit
after the fact, demonstrates our humanity, making
mistakes is our birthright! Using those mistakes as
a weapon to hold ourselves down is a trap that can keep
us from experiencing success and fulfillment.
If we always do our best with what we have to work with
at the time, then any mistake is just something we needed
to learn. Reflection is good; face your mistakes,
learn their lessons by reframing them into opportunities,
forgive yourself for being human, and enjoy your life.
"If I had my life to live again, I'd make the same
mistakes, only sooner."
Tallulah Bankhead
WEAKNESSES CAN BE STRENGTHS
(Author Unknown)
Sometimes your biggest weakness can become your biggest
strength. Take, for example, the story of one 10-year-old
boy who decided to study judo despite the fact that he
had lost his left arm in a devastating car accident.
The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master.
The boy was doing well, so he couldn't understand why,
after three months of training the master had taught him
only one move.
"Sensei," the boy finally said, "Shouldn't
I be learning more moves?"
"This is the only move you know, but this is the
only move you'll ever need to know," the sensei
replied.
Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher,
the boy kept training.
Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his
first tournament.
Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two
matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but
after some time, his opponent became impatient and
charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the
match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in
the finals.
This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more
experienced. For a while, the boy appeared to be
overmatched. Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the
referee called a time-out. He was about to stop the match
when the sensei intervened. "No," the sensei
insisted, "Let him continue." Soon after the
match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: he
dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to
pin him.
The boy had won the match and the tournament. He was the
champion.
On the way home, the boy and sensei reviewed every move
in each and every match. Then the boy summoned the
courage to ask what was really on his mind.
"Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one
move?"
"You won for two reasons," the sensei answered.
"First, you've almost mastered one of the most
difficult throws in all of judo. And second, the only
known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab
your left arm."
THANK YOU
(Author Unknown)
To those of you who have pushed me, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have fallen.
To those of you who laughed at me, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have cried.
To those of you who just couldn't love me, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have known real love.
To those of you who hurt my feelings, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have felt them.
To those of you who left me lonely, thank you.
Without you I wouldn't have discovered myself.
But it is to those of you who thought I couldn't do it;
It is you I thank the most,
Because without you I wouldn't have tried.
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
(Author Unknown)
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This
includes age, weight and height. Let the doctor worry
about them. That is why you pay him/her.
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The
grouches and complainers pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the
computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.
Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the
devil's workshop,"
4. Enjoy the simple things. When the
children are young, that is all that you can afford. When
they are in college, that is all that you can afford.
When you are on retirement, that is all that you can
afford!
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh
until you gasp for breath. Laugh so much that you can be
tracked in the store by your distinctive laughter.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and
move on!!!!! The only person who is with us our entire
life, is ourselves. Be alive while you are alive, don't
put out a mailbox on the highway of death and just wait
in residence for your mail.
7. Surround yourself with what you love,
whether it is family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants,
hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health. If it is good,
preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is
beyond what you can improve, get help.
9. Don't take guilt trips. Go to the
mall, the next county, a foreign country, but not to
guilt country.
10. Tell the people you love, that you
love them, at every opportunity.
11. AND ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS: Life is
not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the
moments that take our breath away.
Most Important
"On Arturo Toscanini's eightieth
birthday, someone asked his son, Walter, what his father
ranked as his most important achievement. The son
replied, "For him there can be no such thing.
Whatever he happens to be doing at the moment is the
biggest thing in his life - whether it is conducting a
symphony or peeling an orange."
-- Ardis Whitman
You can only break a fixation
when it's present.
Maybe you smoke cigarettes and would like to stop. You
can't
break the fixation of smoking when you don't feel the
urge
to smoke. The time to break the smoking habit is
not after
you've had a cigarette and are feeling balanced and happy.
The best time to break the smoking habit is when you want
that next cigarette. You can break the habit when
you pick
up the cigarette and start to light it. That's the
time to
throw it away. If you light it, you give in and are
still
controlled by your fixation. This same process
applies to
any fixation whether it's drinking, over-eating, lust, or
whatever.
- John-Roger
(From: The Way Out Book)
Children Need Love
Children need love, and they need to be
able to trust you.
Don't let them down.
Take good care of yourself so you have that good to offer
your child.
- John-Roger
(From: Loving Each Day for Moms & Dads)
Start
Start with your next breath, and take one
step at a time.
When you look at yourself, if you see so many things you
want to change that it's overwhelming, you might never
start.
So start with one thing. And when you have
succeeded with
that, you may decide to take on the next.
Everything
doesn't have to be changed overnight. Be patient
with
yourself, keep loving yourself and give yourself credit
for
the steps you are taking.
- John-Roger
(From: Q&A from the Heart Journal)
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