Michelle's Page

	Michelle's Page

		Introduction
		By Roger McGough (with changes by me)
		I am the song I am very fond of bananas Wheee!!!!!! Nouns like noses at, nettles at night Tricks that'll tickle and tygers bright Red boots and riddles, rhinos and raths Ozymandias, owls and overgrown paths Dazzlers, dunces, donkeys, and dancer Untamed underpants, unlikely answers Cats and cabbages, cold feet and coves. Tailspins and treetops and yuk!! slithy toes. I am a poet, well not really, but I can eat feet. Oodle, ardle, wardle, that's enough for me. Now off you go and read my book.

		Jokes
		What question can never be answered by yes ?
		What is the end of everything ?
		Why is an empty purse always the same ?
		When a boy falls into water what is the first thing he does ?
		What is the highest building in New York ?

		Answers

		Riddles
		It wasn't my sister, nor my brother, But it was the child of my father and mother. Who was it ?
		When you look around on a cold day, what to you see on every hand ?
		When can your coat pocket be empty, and yet have something in it ?
		When you go to a store for ten pence worth of very sharp tacks, for what do you want them?
		Why does the Statue of Liberty stand in New York harbour?

		Answers

My Art

		Breithlá Liam

		Breithlá Liam a bhí ann. Chuaigh Daidí go dtí an siopa. Chonaic sé an teidí ar an seilf. Teidí álainn agus bhí ribín dearg air. Cheannaigh Daidí an Teidí. Tháinig sé abhaile. Thug sé an Teidí do Liam. Bhí an-áthas air.


		The Worst Place in the World

		I think the worst place in world is Dublin Airport. You may think this is strange, but a couple of years ago I had a terrible experience in Dublin Airport. You see I was going on my holidays to Bulgaria and our flight was delayed several times from 10:00am in the morning till 12:30pm that night. Sitting around Dublin Airport unable to leave for a long time is really the worst place world. Eventually our flight took off. We were about an hour in the air. I was looking forward to my holidays. Then the captain announced that the flight had difficulties and we had to return to Dublin Airport again while they took our luggage off one plane and put it on to another. Our flight took off again but this time we got there. I had an excellent holiday but I still think Dublin Airport is the worst place in the world, even though I go there every year.


		At the Carnival

		One morning Cathy Cucumber, Larry Leek, Patty Pear and Bobby Banana were walking down the road when Cathy Cucumber saw a sign on a billboard: "The Greatest Show On Earth Coming to your Town. The Billy Bean Carnival". The vegetables and fruit thought it sounded great and rushed off to tell all their friends. They were all really excited and decided to go to the Carnival that night. When they got there Clara Carrot got on the Merry Go Around and Bobby Banana got on the Big Wheel. By eight thirty that night all of them had gone on nearly every ride except two, the Haunted House and the Rumble Rollercoaster. They then decided to go into the Haunted House first and then the Rumble Rollercoaster. They slowly walked into the Haunted House when suddenly skeleton dummies popped out and Annie Apple nearly jumped out of her peel with fright so they all had to go out. They started walking over to the Rumble Rollercoaster when Bobby Banana said "My tummy's rumbling with the sound of the Rumble Rollercoaster ". When they reached the Rollercoaster they all hopped into their seats and held on tight. The Rollercoaster started to climb the big hill slowly but surely. Then it took a sharp corner and plunged down another hill. It took a few more corners and hills and then the most frightening of all The Loop a Loop. It came speeding towards it and all of a sudden they were upside down swivelling and turning all over the place. It was the most amazing ride of all they said and from that day on they never forgot about their day in the Carnival.

		Jokes
		What question can never be answered by yes ? Are you asleep?
		What is the end of everything ? The letter G.
		Why is an empty purse always the same ? Because there's never any change in it.
		When a boy falls into water what is the first thing he does ? Gets wet.
		What is the highest building in New York ? The public library, because it has the most stories.

		Riddles
		It wasn't my sister, nor my brother, But it was the child of my father and mother. Who was it ? Myself.
		When you look around on a cold day, what to you see on every hand ? A glove.
		When can your coat pocket be empty, and yet have something in it ? When it has a hole in it.
		When you go to a store for ten pence worth of very sharp tacks, for what do you want them? For ten pence!
		Why does the Statue of Liberty stand in New York harbour? Because it can't sit down!

		Quiz
		1. Where is the Tah Majal? 2. Where is Stonehenge? 3. Where is the Eiffel Tower? 4. Where is the Budda? 5. Where is the Polar Glazier? 6. Where is St. Basil's Church? 7. Where is the Halfpenny Bridge? 8. Where is the Statue of Liberty? 9. What is Victoria from the Spice Girls little baby's name? 10. What does U.F.O stand for? 11. Who plays Buffy in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"? 12. What is Tia and Temera's surname in real life? 13. What is Britney Spears boyfriend's name? 14. What was Britney Spears first single? 15. What was the Spice Girls first single?

		Answers

		Little Poems

		Baby llama Do you think A baby llama Ever calls Its mother "Mama"? Flippers Flapping his flippers The barking seal Cries: "I want fish For my noonday meal!" Ice-Bather A polar bear Believes it's nice, To take a bath In a pool of ice. Trains Over the mountains, Over the plains, Over the rivers, Here come trains.

		Skipping Ropes Someday Jane shall Have, she Hopes, Rainbows For her Skipping Ropes.

		Up in the Air Zooming across the sky, Like a great bird you fly. Airplane, Silvery white In the light. Turning and twisting in air, When shall I ever be there. Airplane, Piloting you Far in the blue?

		Drinking Fountain When I climb up To get a drink, It doesn't work The way you'd think. I turn it up. The water goes And hits me right Upon the nose. I turn it down To make it small And don't get any Drink at all.
		From "Every Child's Story Book"

		Quiz Answers
		1. Where is the Tah Majal? India 2. Where is Stonehenge? United Kingdom 3. Where is the Eiffel Tower? Paris 4. Where is the Budda? Japan 5. Where is the Polar Glazier? Antartica 6. Where is St. Basil's Church? Russia 7. Where is the Halfpenny Bridge? Ireland 8. Where is the Statue of Liberty?New York 9. What is Victoria from the Spice Girls little baby's name? Broklyn 10. What does U.F.O stand for? Unidentified Flying Object 11. Who plays Buffy in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"? Sarah Michelle Gellar 12. What is Tia and Temera's surname in real life? Morwy *13. What is Britney Spears boyfriend's name? Justin from NSync 14. What was Britney Spears first single? "Hit me baby one more time" 15. What was the Spice Girls first single? "Wannabee"**

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