Planning Humour

Index:

The Complete Planner Humour Collection

Planning Jokes

How to identify a Planner
Guidelines for successful Planners Planners Staff Structure
Planning Explained to the Uninitiated Planners Jargon Explained

Planning Complaint form

The Planning Administrator
Planner Harassment What Planners mean when they say . . .
Planning implications of Earth's creation and Hell The PLAN
What is a Planner - there are two views! The Rules of Planning

What Planners mean when they say . . .

What the Planners say

What the Planners mean

What the Developer hears / understands

“I like it.” I like it. They like it.
“Well done!” Well done! We’re done!
“I wish more projects had this feel.” “I wish more projects had this feel.” They like it so much maybe they’ll give us more.
“Lets review this” I don’t like it. It’s taken their breath away!
“Does this meet the regulations?” Can we kill it through technicalities? We’re OK, it meets the regulations...I think
“Well...?” We don’t like it, do we? They have some minor questions.
“What do you think?” You don’t like it either, do you? We’re in trouble, they’re thinking.
“I have some concerns.” I don’t like it. Well, Planners are only one vote!
“It’s... too...” I don’t think I could ever like it. Maybe we overdid the gargoyles.
“Is the applicant here?” Can we talk, or do we have to be diplomatic? No! After spending all of this energy, to say nothing or a King’s ransom in fees, the applicant has decided to go to the racetrack where the odds are better.
“Have you tried...?” This doesn’t work. There’s not enough in the budget to do it once, let alone twice.
“Let’s look at the landscape plan.” Maybe we can just hide it. There goes the landscape budget!
“That’s an...‘ interesting’ approach. What planet did this come from? They like it.
“Lets get other staff involved.” Maybe the other staff can tell you what we’ve been unable to communicate. Who do they think got us into this mess? There goes another month.
“It’s too...er...googie.” There’s no way I can teach them what’s good design, so I’ll get technical. He doesn’t like the gargoyles.
“Yes, we’ve heard the argument that planners breed design mediocrity.” We’d be happy if this was even mediocre. They know we’re going to blame this “camel” on them.


and finally, did you know

Carelessly planned projects take three times longer to complete  than expected. Carefully planned projects take four times longer to complete than expected, mostly because the planners expect their planning to reduce the time it takes.

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